For the first twenty-three-years of my life, I lived within my five senses, trusting them to define my reality. On the day I realized there was much more, my life changed forever. This encounter with a higher power was so powerful and beautiful that I never again wanted to be apart from it. Though I had limited knowledge, I learned certain truths that would stay with me forever.
First, I learned that there is a higher power and with it a purpose to life. It filled me with overwhelming sense of relief. Living as an atheist, I didn’t find a reason for life; for living. I lived my life, worked, played, had friends, enjoyed my family, but all this was superficial. So you can imagine the wonder, admiration, and humility I felt when realized that a higher intelligence set it all in motion. I was filled with awe, and wanted to explore this “new” reality.
Secondly, I learned that I had a soul which was much older than my physical body. I learned that we come into a physical body many times to learn lessons and evolve, so one day we will be one with God, again. For that reason, what we do for our soul is more important than what we do for our body. Our body, like our car, takes us from place to place, and it is important to keep it in good condition. However, it shouldn’t be more important than our higher self, the driver.
Next, I learned that there was a higher order in what I considered to be a random chaos in the world. Even if I couldn’t see, or understand it, there was a big plan for humanity, and it was playing itself out. It made me feel small, very small, but I liked it. To start, I knew I had to put my life in order first. Instead of focusing on how my future would look (which I did,) I needed to focus on the present, and the right things would get to me at the right time. I was ready to start exploring, and turn my life around.
Finally, the wonderful feeling of relief, as of a lost son coming home, and the love I felt in my heart, is still with me these many years later. Those are not feelings that can be fully described in words, but need to be experienced. Even today, I look at the lesson of living without God as one of the most painful, but also one of the most important my soul will experience in this life.